Uncharted Reckonings -- The Western Terminals of the World. (SEQUEL TO PALM CANYON DRIVE)

(READ PALM CANYON DRIVE BEFOREHAND)

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THIS IS FUCKING AWESOME! WE’RE FRIENDS, WE’RE BESTFRIENDS, ALL OF US!

You’re having a good time aren’t you man?? It’s pretty nice isn’t it?

Colter, you’re fine right? Not too hot?

NAAAH, this is great AWESOME

You want a menthol? Trust me bro

HAHA NAH NO FUCKIN WAY

--

I was there and I wasn’t people where and they weren’t. Just faces in the crowds, individuals creating masses and there was individuality but mostly just bodies. Floating bodies communicating thru images and sounds, lights and colors, all the real colors of the world surrounding the entirety of the dancing vibrations off of the desert floor. It’s not man made its not god made, the ring of light shown from the edge of earth. Constellations of ignited eyes all bound by the eternal burning stars

The lights became brighter, the music started to sing louder, everything thrown to the stars through the galaxies of our fates, it all became gorgeous just as the sun started seeping into the far reaching horizon and the edge of the earth was seen, at the edge of creation, the edge of life and the edge of all beautiful, real colors, colors out of explanation or comprehension by any man or woman.

Colter, are you sure you’re alright?

Ah yeah fine mhm okay yeah I’m coooool

You want some gum man, some Big Red?

Naah, too hot, any water? It’s hot

Colter, lets get out of the crowd, cman lets go back there to the breeze

My world spun and kept spinning and all the beauty was overwhelming and became heavy, the whole world started falling, I laid down in the dirt, the grass, the salt of the earth at my back and the stars above me gleaming down in amusement.

This happens man, just lie down and relax, take in the music, just chill out. Trust me bro this happens to everyone

Thanks thanks man thank you I’m just gonna lay here

You okay Colter?

This was a mistake, I shouldn’t have done this, I knew I couldn’t take it

What’d he say?

He said he shouldn’t have done it, that it was a mistake

Awh Colter you’ll be fine, just listen to the music, this is your favorite band

I laid back into the salt of the earth and shut my eyes to the stars and there I was back in front of that painting. Different music was around me now and I didn’t want to be home or back in the hotel or back on Palm Canyon Drive, I just wanted to reach the woman that was running in front. 

Everything that an individual ever really truly wants always feels out of reach, not a possession or a currency but a feeling, a good feeling a feeling of purpose and conviction those are the things that are always running fleeting away and won’t turn around and smile. Those are the things that you stare out the window looking at for 30 minutes when you thought it was only 5, when time is nonsense and it’s just wants, hopes, and dreams

The woman turned around quickly and I saw the side of her face and I knew who she was, the universe had shown me her before but only in dreams of a different place and every time I saw her I would then wake up and I would only get a glimpse. Her name came to me one morning or perhaps one night as Veritas, she never told me, I never told me but truth is one of the only things that is always beautiful and I reached out my hand as I thought she was as well, then everything slowed down and the images were beginning to be warped again

COLTER IT’S YOUR SONG!!!

I opened my eyes and the stars were still hanging in the sky and the salt of the earth was still under me but I got up on my feet to feel the sounds. Everything was real and the breeze blowing around all the individuals interweaving in a chaotic beauty, no faces but just dancing bodies filled with delusions of electric eyes and the proliferation of lunacy all setting sail for the utopia

THIS IS SO GREAT JESUS THIS IS SO AWESOME

You’re feeling better?

AH YAH, FEELING LIKE A MILLION HUNDRED FUCKIN DOLLARS

Haha bro you want that menthol now?

Nah I’m still good

I don’t know, it’s almost painful to think about, hard to reflect, and difficult to comprehend but I think there are times, happenings, things, that can’t really truly honestly be put into language, no combination of words, no projection of ideas can really recreate the feeling when an individual is experiencing or inside a blissful place. Perhaps it happens more than the individual even recognizes and time just goes by too quickly, and the sand in the hourglass slowly dwindles away into nothingness and if you’re lucky you may be able to reflect on the dancing images of the euphoria and the truths at a separate time

Places that are unmistakably filled with truth, and virtue, and it doesn’t have to attempt to be like that, it just is and it just does. It isn’t homogenized, but it’s individualistic with the accentuation of eloquence with a climatic elated moment that lasts for eternity within that place of virtue

This is so great, this is so ridiculous

HAHAHA, it is isn’t it

All this shit makes sense, the lights on the Palm trees, the art sculptures, the desert, it all makes sense

What do you mean?

I mean as soon as that sun falls behind that horizon this place becomes unexplainable. During the day I was like oh that’s cool oh alright but now, now it all makes sense, it’s all true, all truth

Oh I know

The drugs, the alcohol, all comes secondary to this, all of this

Bro it’s a real trip isn’t it

Hah it fucking is

There was no reference to sun, man, or God but the truths from the salt of the earth and the warping images and bright lights solemnly hanging in orbit around us, sprouting from the earth. I turned to my friends and yelled to them and everyone else

“THIS IS GOD, THIS IS THE NEW EDEN”.

Everyone else there and not there, here and not here, then and now, it all makes sense, it all makes perfect sense, the stars have aligned to sounds and the images of life in an all overwhelming truth. There wasn’t any hope, no doubt, but perfect nothingness unscathed by any man’s ideologies or convictions but harmony and only harmony

I shut my eyes one more time just to hear and feel and there she was, Veritas. She had dark curly hair and tanned olive skin, she held out her hands and grabbed me tight to her body then whispered words into my ear with an accent that I never had heard, I stepped back and looked at her with dried lips and large pupils filled with amazement.  

The music had stopped, the dancing bodies solemnly swung with the breeze.

Murmuring resonances of a fleeting feeling

It was the electric Eye, the utopia, the new Eden with more Eves and more Adams, it was the painting, Veritas smiling back at me, it was my friends, it was harmony, it was the sun in all its colors, and man made beauty the god made beauty and then the beauty that can’t be explained all marching and elongating before us like strands of the night, tentacles to bind us to the reality yet to come.

The desert is an inspiring place, go to it

Palm Canyon Drive

My friends that I came to Palm Springs with left in the early afternoon for their festivities at Coachella. I was stuck in our suite with nothing on my plate, nothing to do, nobody to see, no agenda. I also was recovering from a massive hangover being that I really took to celebrating the night before. The drive from Seattle took around 25 hours or so, and I felt I needed to let myself go since sitting in a seat for that long is actually quite difficult.

I finally took my shower, and clothed myself around 4 in the late afternoon. I didn’t know what I was to go do, or go see. I ended up finding the main strip in Palm Springs, which is called Palm Canyon Drive and I went from one end of it to the other. I found myself innately walking slow in order to take in my surroundings.

It’s a beautiful little town. I myself am a lover of the past, or at least the thought and images of the past. Specifically the 50s and 60s. Not the hippie 60s but the “mod” sixties, the Mad Men sixties and the cool portrayal of them in movies. I’m not saying Palm Springs is exactly like that, but it definitely has a “retro” or a “vintage” feel to it. I instantly felt about half way down the main strip that I was in a timeless place, a place that hasn’t really changed and that if you left it 10 years ago, and came back today you would feel like you were living twice.

I find that there is an authenticity in that, a consistency in that, and a not hidden but obvious beauty in it.

As I was walking down the side walk there was a good amount of bars/restaurants and stores, much of them were either “desert clothing”, “antiques”, but what stuck out to me the most was the abundance of art galleries. It seemed like for every other block there was a few.

I only walked into one of them. It was an outdoor gallery but had a large tent over it. The place was completely empty and there was loud music playing. The pieces were massive and were stretched from end to end in paint and canvas. Most of the pieces were abstract, but had a beautiful display of colors in an array of different geometrical lines and shapes. I walked around the entire gallery until one particular piece struck me.

I probably stood in front of the damn thing for 10 minutes just staring into it. I don’t know exactly what it was about the piece that made me so intrigued, maybe it was because it was relatable, something I wanted and want, maybe because it brought me some form of harmony or perhaps my mind was running at a natural high so everything felt and appeared beautiful. And once I completely soaked my eyes into the image the music disappeared

I’ll do my best in describing the piece. It had these large street lights, benches on either side and green fields, yellow and brown leaves falling around, it was probably set in the fall in a place that has a fall, and then there was what looked like a gravel path going down the middle, and it seemed as if the objects like the benches and street lights got smaller and smaller, to create depth and a objectiveness, a skill I’ll never be able to wrap my head around.

However what made the piece really pull me in was that there was a woman in the middle; she was off in the distance out of reach. I want to say she was running, running with the wind and the falling leaves. It made me want to reach out and run with her, to dance in all the real colors, with the perfect leaves and balanced street lights, I longed for that image and I couldn’t and still can’t get it out of my mind.

Maybe when a painting or an image represents something that we all want, something we long for whether it be a thing, object, idea, or person there is a beauty in that, there is a brilliance in that something that can’t be written down effectively, no combination of 10 dollar words, or insightful pros can honestly show that conviction, and that kind of truth. I think only the person can imagine that, and eventually dream it.

The painting was beautiful and at first it made me almost sad because it was so perfect, and the image of my adaptation in my mind made me want to not just dream it but experience it, and live it. Maybe I will, or perhaps I already have and can’t remember.

I walked out of the gallery into the sun and back down the streets of the timeless city, not dated, but aged. A kind of age that has no limit and no sense of time. It makes it’s own moments in relation to itself.   

As I looked down Palm Canyon Drive everything really did seem far away, but not out of reach.

Palm Springs for the weekend

Story coming later when I have a smoke and drink in my hand. 

BEYOND THE INFINITE

You know you should talk to him he’d really like to hear from you, give him a call

Give him a call? Really I don’t know

No he’s your Godfather give your fucking Godfather a call he’d like to hear from you and he’ll totally stoke out all you and your friends – it’d be fun

Alright, alright I’ll give him a call

--

Hey Tom! Its Colter, Colter Fox

Holy shit Colter how yah been?!?!

I’ve been good, I’ve been good, how have you been?

I’ve been great Colter, it’s really nice to hear from you. How has school been coming along? Any girls in your life? I know you and those girls, your father has told me

Oh he has? Yeah there was one and now there isn’t. And school has been ridiculous but I’m graduating in a couple weeks and then it’s NL in the fall to be an English major

Oh that’s wonderful Colter, I’d love to read some of your writing

Yeah I’d love to share with you. It’s finally coming together; I think I’ve finally started to figure some stuff out

That’s great, lemme know when your first movie comes out, ah shit I’ll probably see your face on the advertisements haHAH

Oh yeah will do, I’ll get right on that. But my dad mentioned something about your new business? Pretty awesome sounding stuff and my birthday is coming up in a month or so and I think your place would be fun to come with a couple of my buddies.

Ooooh yeah!!! You should definitely come down, I’ll show you the place, I’ll stoke yah out

That’d be great, you think I could come down next week and check it out? I’ll come on a weeknight when yah aren’t so busy. I’ll bring a buddy of mine, Zach. You’ve met him, but it’s been years

Colter you don’t even need to ask, just mention my name at the door. You and your buddies are always welcome. I know you ride with some good fellas, and for fucks sake we’re family!

That we are Tom. Alright does Wednesday work for you, around 8 or so?

That’s just fine, I’ll be up in my office. Just give me a holler when you’re close

Will do, Tom

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How far is this place out man?

It’s in the south end, supposedly a classy place from what my dad told me

Oh fuck yeah man this is gonna be fucking tight, fuckin Tom man coming up with the most random shit, its been years

The most awesome shit

Yeah fucking right man

Free entry, and VIP?

I’m sure man, Tom is a generous soul

--

Tom! Jesus Christ yah old man you look great! And you remember Zach, right?

Oh shit! It’s been long you young guns look great I tell yah fucking superb. I see yah still got my knife I gave yah Colter, you haven’t had to use it yet have you? haHAH

No I haven’t Tom thank god

Hah well that’s great. The girls are starting to flutter in now oooh weeee what a job this is

Zach: Fucking heaven on earth man, the promise land

That’s right boys, the fucking promise land. Well lemme give you Le Grand Tour, follow me. Over to your right there is the soda bar. Here in Washington State we can’t serve booze fuckin shame I tell yah. And I don’t think I need to point out the main stage it kind of speaks for it’s self. Man the girls climb up and down that thing like acrobats! It’s a fucking trip! Oh and back over there is the VIP. I’ll take yah fellas in here, the best part about this place! Only for the “Very Important” ahHAH

Colter: Man, Tom you are really doing well for yourself, this is a classy joint. Real gentleman’s club, not any trashy shit we’ve been to

Oh yeah Colter, I take pride in it. My pride and joy. And the hottest girls, fake tits, beautiful faces, they all look like they just walked off a magazine

Zach: haha no shit, this is ridiculous

Girl 1: Who are these handsome boys, Tom?

Oh well this is Colter here, he’s my Godson! And here is Zach, good buddy of Colter’s, been friends since before they even knew what tits were!

Girl 1: oh well that’s just fantastic, you boys in college?

Colter: Yeah I’m about to be going to NL; I’m in the process of transferring to study English

Zach: And I study at BIU, and I’m a business major

Tom: Scholars! Smarter than I ever will be! Hey Natalia! Natalia sweet heart!

Natalia: Be right there Tom

PAUSE

Tom: How bout you show these boys the real VIP experience, they want to get a taste, it’s Colter’s birthday next month and he wants to come back with some more of his boys.

Natalia: Oh sure thing Tom, how bout you come with me boys

Colter: yep okay

Zach: mhm yah

Tom: Natalia is the best! She’s the mother hen around here

Natalia: oh shush Tom!

--

Natalia showed Zach and I into the VIP lounge area, with the neon at its full brightness hanging on the ceiling. The walls were all glass, our reflections all seen. The corners of the lounge were darker where men would come and sit with their paid company. Beautiful women, with gorgeous bodies. Bodies that most of these men, often lonely men, would only see in their dreams or walking down the sidewalk but they would never think of even a second look let alone one of them sitting on their laps.

--

Natalia: you like the place boys? Pretty cool, huh?

Zach: Oh yeah this is great, really nice

Colter: yeah this is wonderful

Natalia: Now what kind of girls you boys like? White girls? Black girls? How about Hispanic? Latinas? Asian girls? What’s your preference?

Colter: I like tan girls, darker you know. I guess

Zach: I have no preference, surprise me!!

Natalia: haha okay then, find your places and some girls will come in in a jiffy

--

Zach: dude this IS GONNA BE SO FUCKING AWESOME

Colter: those pills kicking in yet? These lights feel like they are getting brighter and brighter

Zach: oh yeah man, oh yeah fully IGNITED! 

--

Two half naked women walked in. A blonde girl with decent curves walked over to Zach and reached out her hand and then swung a long leg over his waist. The other girl walked over to me with long black hair and sunken eyes, she was on the shorter side with perfectly tan skin and a curving body

Stripper: And what’s your name handsome? I hear you’re the birthday boy to be

My name is Colter, and yeah that’s correct. What’s your name?

Penelope. You’re really Tom’s godson?

Yeah that’s right I am.

Alright then I’ll give you special treatment then

Sounds great, Penelope

I’d like to talk to you afterwards, handsome, you have a girl?

Nope, sounds great

Is everything great for you?

Yeah, at least right now

--

 She started doing her dance her body swaying in a nonsensical way, she would just go to the waves the music playing around us

The neon shine started dripping from the ceiling and congealing around us wrapping Penelope, illuminating her body onto mine

It shined down onto the carpet and filled the room with a warm harmony

She kept swaying back and forth taking off the small amount of clothing she had on, making noises, and breathing in my ear and down my neck, my consciousness was displaced and all I heard was whispering in my ears of unknown tongue

She outstretched her arms pulling the galaxies and every universe into the room, one hand in space and the other tugging at my physical existence, bringing me closer to the surface, nearing reality

Then she flung her hands onto my chest, fingernails dug into my skin, and her angelic features were falling from her gaze

It was gorgeous and gorgeousity made flesh

Gravity was nonsense now, and I felt my body rising to the neon then feeling all the real colors and knowing that this was the deepest summer

It was a manufactured distortion of images and illusion

Illusion of doubts, illusions of her and me and the neon lights from above and Tom and Natalia and the mirrored room, and when I look into the walls all I see is the neon and Penelope’s naked back, I’m not there anymore but only with my memory

But I looked harder into the lights harder into my memory and I see the burning pillars reflectively bouncing off the corners of the room trying to guide me home

I don’t know if Zach and his girl were there anymore, I don’t know if any one of us were ever there, I don’t know if it all happened or if it was just a twisted dream of consciousness being displaced by consumption of an individual’s “goods” on a corner or the parking lot of a grocery store. You wake some mornings or you think back to things and happenings and who knows if they were real, or if this is real and if we make things the way we want because it’s easier to fall asleep at night and its easier to not have to remember, but then maybe we are just pulling galaxies and staring into lights when we should be staring into mirrors instead

But then I took my eyes and I shot them to the ceiling and the stars were coming through now and descending, and I knew then that I would have to fight the morning off

The stars and the constellations of the stars and the galaxies of the universes and everything beyond the infinite were bouncing off of her shoulders and the constellations were moving and spinning around the room as if they had been there before

The entire universe of the entire creation of the infinite had been inside the parameters of the boundlessly mirrored room. It was an unknown land to me, she was the starchild, the guiding light of all the real and all the colors, me a man a young man with no placement and no woman with a woman from a different land all falling through the stars

The neon had fully manifested now and I knew then that this was the end, all the real colors of the world, and the burning pillars of hope with the neon hue seeping and falling into the constellations all to guide me home.

 I then closed my eyes and plummeted beyond the infinite,

the infinite of the waking dreams, and the burning contemplations, and the things that don’t make any sense no matter how long you spend in front of the mirror, trying over and over again to convince us of something that we can’t believe.

--

The quiet music that had been playing was off and all I heard was silence falling from Penelope’s eyes

She smiled and disappeared into the neon

--

I lit a cigarette walking to my car. Zach was sprawled out on my hood laying down smoking a joint.

I turned around and saw Tom waving, saying “Hope to see yah in a month boys!!!”

I yelled back thanks and put on my sunglasses.

I reached into my pocket for my keys and felt a card. I took it out, and it read The Neon on the front and had a number and email address for booking

I flipped the card over and it had another number in scribbled handwriting, below the digits it read, “Penelope”.