The sun dove behind the clouds and only shot individual rays
down onto the water. As the water swayed nonsensically in its random way the
jets of lights would bounce off to the reflection in our eyes. I squinted even
with wearing sunglasses and looked down at her.
She was to my right and looking at the water as well as it
was washing up onto the beach and between her toes mixing in with the sand.
Don’t you wish you could just stretch certain moments out?
Haha, what are you saying Colter?
I mean that I wish certain great moments in life would just
take the place of other times and we could just make the better moments last
longer
--
Stretch moments out into distortion till the edges blur, and
there isn’t any night or day or time and reality is realized till you can’t see
anything anymore and its just chaotic bliss
--
Isn’t it already like that, in a way?
I don’t think so?
I mean you hold important events in your memory for longer
than shitty moments making the better moments actually last longer
Fuck, okay, yeah, good point. But that’s only in memory, I
want to stretch my arms out and pinch my fingers together so everything will
just shut the hell up and it would just be you and I watching the sound and the
light and clouds and fuck everyone else
--
I looked down at the water as I saw her looking off into the
distance. I watched the water flow in between my toes, I could feel the smooth
rocks beneath my feet, I looked over at her and her dark hair blew with the breeze
off of the sound. I took in a deep breath to smell and taste the salt. It was
beautiful, it all is beautiful.
--
But I mean I was listening to the radio the other day and they
were talking about this family that died all together in a car crash, 4 people
died, the mom and dad and the children all just fucking died, and these school
shootings, or cancer or whatever the fuck it’s all shit yet here we are
Yeah, its weird, I don’t know, I try not to think about
those things. It doesn’t do any good.
I agree, but I guess it makes you appreciate things a bit
more. Like this moment right here, looking out over the water, I appreciate
this. The little things yah know? I want take it slow, soak up every moment because
you really don’t know what will happen. We’re just lucky.
Yeah, I guess we are
Now I don’t want to sound pretentious or arrogant but I
think I find most things underwhelming, maybe I don’t live a crazy enough life
style but I can recognize the moments that really matter, at least I think so
Is this one of those moments?
--
She stepped sideways and put her arm around my lower back
and looked up at me. I could see myself in the reflection of her sunglasses, me
looking down, her looking up mirroring each other. I could now smell her perfume
mixed with the salty air. It was just us there on the beach, nobody else. I
wanted long mornings and late nights. Taking every sip and bit and trickling
moment of life. Life and its moments and the moments that matter, stretched to
fit my liking.
--
It is. I don’t know if I’ve seen perfect. I don’t even know
if perfection is a thing, a real thing but it seems like this is pretty close,
it happens more than we realize but we’re just moving too quick to notice.
It doesn’t take much does it?
No it really doesn’t
--
The ocean foam started to congeal around our ankles and my
feet became numb. It was summer but not a true summer, not the deep summer
where your legs, and shoulders and feet are bare to the sun and darkened by its
rays, not yet. It was overcast with those jets of light bouncing off of the
sound. It’s funny, or ironic or perhaps just odd that the dullest of days can
be the brightest because you don’t expect as much, but things just happen.
Things just happen without any sort of idea or plan of action but they just
happen and we are witness to this.
What is time, what is real, what is essence, what is true,
what is purpose, what is conviction, and what is all of this we call home?
Us children of the sun, witness to beauty and dumbed brains
to the drumming of the man made concrete jungles and sweet sunsets that ooh and
ahh us.
I want to harness it all, feel every rhythm, but its god’s
work or some god’s work or the cosmos random looming’s in the constellations
above us past the clouds, sun, and any intellect of man. It’s just here and
we’re just here,
and it was just us on that beach watching the gorgeous
clashing of the waves
--
Lets take the long way home
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